... The Transformation Begins

I knew this was going to happen to me. It can happen to anyone, I just wasn't expecting it to hit me this fast. The first step is admitting you have a problem, so here goes nothing: I Am Becoming European. I feel so much better just having that off my chest. I say that partially in jest, but in all actuality I am truly becoming more European by the day. Don't believe me? I mean a 225lb meat loving, football playing, pig roasting, loud mouth American just all the sudden blends in with the French and Russians? Believe it!

For starters I no longer smile or otherwise emote while on the street or in public. Russians just don't do that. It appears as though while in public here, one tries to maximize time with their mouth closed. This means no smiling, yawning, laughing, coughing, mouthing words to the tunes bumping on you iPod, or otherwise acting alive. (An obvious exception is when with a significant other, in which case the goal is to break the world record for time with a vacuum-seal between two peoples mouth) Given that I want to fit it I am working on this. For those of you who know me well, this is a struggle. I am notorious for talking to my self, singing along poorly to any available tuneage, or just sitting some where with my mouth agape and a dumb look on my face. So to pass the time I have been working on my "Russian face". There is a certain face all sober Russians put on when they enter the metro. It can only be described as "the Russian face". I have been practicing and improving, but its surprisingly difficult to look simultaneously a tiny bit sad and generally bored with the world around you.

My clothing. Imagine EuroTrash... now imagine me wearing that... now banish that heinous thought from your mind because that would never happen. I have however been trying to make my clothes fit it with those around me. I'm wearing slightly tighter jeans and my normal t-shirts (they are tight enough... thanks). Every day I slip into a pair of jeans from high school and think to my self "craig you would never wear that in Аmerica" but I wear them out anyways to feel cool. So I leave the house most days wearing euro shoes, tighter than normal jeans, a polo, and my Lauren jacket... very Euro, very plain, very much not me. (not for nothing, note the egregious brand drop I just pulled... very euro)

Social life. Not Euro. My house and apartment has no laundry machines. I need to do laundry occasionally. Those of you who entered my dorm room may not believe it, but its true. So my social life consists of going over to my friend Bryn's apartment, throwing my laundry in her machine, grabbing a beer and watching...oh god... futbol. Yup the one with the round ball that they kick around. Yeah I guess we don't have it in America, or its really obscure or something because I had never heard of it. Well, we watch it, I get my laundry done and have a beer, life is good.

The worst part. In America, when watching sports when something sweet happens you have literally thousands of options as to verbal responses. We have swears, catch phrases, applicable noises, chants, insults, and series's of grunts and clicks. Its fun, its American, its good. In Russia, they have essentially one noise. And when I uttered it yesterday, watching Russia disappointingly get shellacked by Spain, I was aghast. It went something like this, Russia turns over the ball again, after a bad pass on a slow counter attack, Spain strikes quickly and makes a great cross Villa takes an open shot, Craig say "OY!" Thats right OY. My response to something exciting in sports was OY. I was sad.

Any ways, enough about my Eurofication. I have a fun adventure coming up. Its more like a job that I got pinned with, but calling it an adventure makes it seem more fun. Next weekend, not this upcoming one, is the FHM Executive Committee meeting. One of the EC members is flying in tomorrow so I have to pick her up from the airport and take her to a metro stop, from which she claims she can get to the apartment she is staying in. I got this task because no one else wants to do it because tomorrow is Russia Day. Think fourth of July with 20 Million Russians, thats what Moscow will be like tomorrow. So while everyone is out partying I will be picking some one up from the airport. Its ok though I'll just go out after... and probably before too.

(Pictures are, from top: Moscow police on horses, the site where Lomonosov founded Moscow University, the Kremlin walls, Red square with St. Basil's in the distances)

From Russia, with love
-Крейг