Craig Introduces Man-Canomics to Russia

I have few unique skills in life. I'd like to think that I have at least a few general skills as well, but all in all few of them are genuinely unique. One of these unique skills is the ability to draw a crowd. I have to imagine its due in some part to a combination of my loud voice, my large stature, and my gregarious personality. I some how forgot to check this skill at customs on my way into the country and I can only imagine it might get me deported.

As I noted earlier, St. Petersburg is made up of 42 interconnected islands, due in large part to the number of canals and rivers that transverse the city. Naturally, there are three islands, however, in draining the swampy marshland of a city, it was compulsory (favorite phrase of Russians to convey the idea of necessary) to make a number of canals. This plethora of canals and rivers means that one of the fastest ways to see all of the major land marks of the city is to take a boat cruise. This is a logical choice considering I'm a foreign student visiting the country, so Dasha and I make this one of our "cultural excursions"

Anyone who has ever been on a boat trip of any kind knows that there is one thing that is inextricably linked to boat travel, and that is Drinking. Fishing trips, cruises, party boats, white water rafting... okay bad example.This is a cultural phenomenon, not just me being Joe College (Lets be serious here, its not like I invented the Booze Cruise). So pre-boat ride Dasha and I head to the Магазин to get some snackies. She gets cookies and a water, I get a can of beer. Alright it was a man-can of beer. Fine, and if you want split hairs here man-cans in Russia are technically one liter. The Conversation goes as follows:

Dasha: Isn't that a bit much for a boat ride.
Me: No, I'm thirsty. And furthermore I have a responsibility to have a man-can.
Dasha: Thats dumb. How could you possibly be "responsible" to drink that.
Other Guys Near By: Yeah explain that dude, that doesn't make any sense.
Me: Allow me to enlighten you. First I'm too thirsty for just a regular can, this isn't a classy enough event for a bottle, and I wouldn't deign myself to buy a 2-litre plastic bottle. Thus etiquette in this situation dictates a man-can. (this is where I break into broken russian/english and gesticulations) Second, the carbon-footprint of a can comes not from the can but the production of the can i.e. mining, transport, refining, transport, production, transport. etc. Therefor the size of the can is irrelevant. So if I am going to put the burden of that can, regardless of size, on the environment I should derive as much pleasure from it as possible in order to offset the environmental cost (GDH > Carbon Emissions). Thus I am responsible for drinking this can in order to save the environment.
Other Guys: Wow thats amazing logic. Man Cans for Everyone!
Me: My job is done Here.
Dasha: You're an Idiot.

While many of you may agree with Dasha on this argument, it should be noted that during the course of my lecture on Man-Canomics I drew a crowd of easily 15-20 people. At least ten of them chose to buy or at least upgrade to man-cans after hearing my thoughts. All of those people left happy, and the shop owner made better business. If all of those people go out and share Man-canomics with their friends, it would spread so fast that we could make a Kevin Spacey, Haley-Joel Osment movie out of my story. Lets do this people, lets change the world one beer at a time.

ramble on,
Craig